Thursday, May 27, 2010

Perception is reality

Someone I know used to say that aaaaaall the time. I hated it. REALITY is reality. Or at least it was before they put it on TV and started scripting and staging it. Nothing is sacred these days. Back to the point. Apparently, I hated that saying so much that I can't even remember who said it anymore, even though I've been racking my brain for a while trying to remember. Feel free to chime in if you know...

No? Alrighty then. Moving on.

I've been thinking about perception a lot lately. For example, the lady in my Zumba class whom I always thought was giving me the stink eye turned out to be really nice. BONUS -she's British, and I LOOOOVE her accent! I could listen to her talk for hours. But I would never have known that had I not decided to speak to her. Who knows what she thought about me...maybe she thought I've been giving her the stink eye. I do steadfastly stand by my impression of Rainbow Brite as a bit of a snot though. But in all honesty, I think that might my own insecurity coming through. Shame on me if that's the case. Perception. It can be a force for good or evil.

I've been looking for an occasional babysitter for the kids and if searching through oodles and oodles of potential influences on your kids isn't stressful enough, how much can you really tell from a profile? Because, really, who is going to put anything negative on their profile? "Hi! My name is Britney. I'm 22 years old and I drink like a fish, so I'll generally be hung over when I'm in charge of your precious little darlings. I'm happy to take your money to watch your kids, but they are going to sit in front of the TV for hours on end and I'm going to let them eat whatever they want, because, hey - you won't be paying me enough to care about their nutritional needs. Oh, and my boyfriend will be over a lot. He just got out of jail, and we haven't seen each other much in the last year."

It's kind of the same thing with meeting them briefly. You get an impression, but no guarantee that it's accurate. See how I analyze myself into a virtual black hole? I think too much. It might actually be dangerous now. I didn't do this as much before I had kids. I wonder if it's hormonal....

Anyway, with all my over-analyzing, I still managed to hire a baby sitter who pulled a no show on Tuesday night. Although, in her defense, we had a miscommunication about a week and a half ago. She called one night when I wasn't available and talked to R. She said she was told I'd call her back, R said she said she'd call me before she came on Tuesday. Then she called and cancelled because she was sick. That's cool - people get sick and she has a full time nanny position, so she would have worked all day and evening being sick. Totally understandable! We rescheduled for this past Tuesday. She never called, she never showed. We called her and left a message - was she okay? Had we mixed up times or dates? Was it just not a good fit? I'll never know because she hasn't returned my call. What's my perception about all of that? I just don't think the chemistry was right. It happens. Plus, T told me the one time she watched them that she stayed on the phone a lot. Doing that with my kids is like waving a red flag in front of a very angry bull. It's seen as a challenge by them, no doubt about it. It couldn't have been pretty. I'm actually surprised she agreed to come back after that. Plus, I'm not much of a phone person these days. Something about having to talk on the phone for years at work has left me feeling....not so telephonically inclined. This is a definite minus for me, because the entire planet seems attached to their cell phone/iPhone/Blackberry. I still don't text and our cheapo pay as you go phones aren't set up to get text messages, so if you know my number and are texting me, I'm not ignoring you, I just don't get 'em. I swear. No, really!

So...perception. Anyone out there have any good stories that make me look less neurotic?

No comments: