I met with a committee at the elementary school here on Wednesday. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but I was a little intimidated that there was a room full of 'experts' that were there to decide the fate of my son. Only three of the seven had even seen him and only two of those had any interaction with him at all. I keep telling myself that whatever happens, the important thing is that T gets any help he needs. At the same time, I'm resistant to attaching a label on him --like ADHD (which I know he doesn't have), Autistic (which I'm still not sure about), or anything else. No matter what happens, it won't change the way I feel about him -- nor will it change the fact that I'm going to do everything in my power to help him in any way I can.
But if I'm being completely honest, I don't want him labeled because I don't think he'll ever get an unbiased shot from that point on. I see on a daily basis all the things he's capable of. One of my greatest fears is that he'll learn to hide behind that label and stop trying to be the best he can be. That would, without a doubt, be a tragedy. So of course this makes me think about all the other kids out there going through this and how ready certain committees are to slap a label on you and go on their merry way. It really, really pisses me off.
On Wednesday, as we are discussing T, I'm noticing that more and more he's being discussed around me. I vow to fight for him tooth and nail. I fear it's going to take a fight to get him the assistance he needs. It figures that the one military member of the committee has already made up her mind that he's developmentally disabled/delayed/autistic. The Major is making a big deal out of the fact that T wouldn't 'self-soothe' and did not want to hear that it was temper. I know this because as soon as he got what he wanted, all was right with the world again. And I point out that she spent less than 10 minutes with him, so I am certain she did not get a complete picture. How could she? He refused to have anything to do with her. Of course it fell on deaf ears, and she tells me that I'm giving him too much credit. I shoot back that she's entitled to her opinion but until she's spent enough time with T to actually evaluate him properly, her opinion means little to me.
It's going well, dontcha think?
So, the committee decides to evaluate him mostly at Mrs. J's. We all agree that it will probably go better if I'm not right there. I don't want T to pick up on my formed opinions of certain *coughMAJORcough* committee members. Interestingly enough, they plan to email their findings to R, not me. I guess I'll only be notified of when to take him to the behavioral pediatrician. Whatever. This is one messed up system at times. I have no idea when any of this will happen, only that the evaluation is expected to be completed within 30 days. Stay tuned.. I'm sure this will not be my last post about this subject.
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