Thursday, August 22, 2013

Coulda, shoulda, woulda.....

I first saw this as a shared post from George Takei's Facebook page.



And I laughed and laughed. Because, you see, my husband is an adorable, lovable, Star Trek (the original and Voyager) and Star Wars fan. And I have seen enough original Star Trek episodes to love a good Shatner impression.

When I posted earlier about my car battery misadventures, I was still irritated (obviously) that I was standing out in the broiling sun with two small kids and no one cared enough to make sure we were okay. Even the police parked nearby.

What I failed to remember is that this - THIS - my friends would have been the perfect opportunity to practice my SHATNER! skills.

Imagine it: It's 80 degrees outside, 103 if you are in direct sunlight, 250 if you are in direct sunlight in a black vehicle with black interior. The little old guy behind you agrees to help you jump off your car, you both fail miserably at making that work, and then he drives off and leaves you without a word.

What I did: nothing
What I should have done: shouted out 'I've been...abandoned!! ABANDONED!' while shaking my fist at the sky or the departing vehicles or the cop.

So you walk a long way in the brain melting heat to make sure your kids know that 1) you didn't forget about them and 2) you will take any situation and handle it, cause that's what parents do, yo!

What I did: walk to get the kids and walk them back to the car with me
What I should have done: once I got within sight distance of the school staff and my  kids, fallen to my knees and started to crawl towards the kids gasping, "car battery....died. No....one...would....help. So.....hot. Water.     Waaaattteeerrrrrr..... and then collapsed dramatically.

Your husband arrives about 5 minutes after you get back to the car.

What I did: gave him a huge hug and start trouble shooting the problem between him, me, and the vehicle manual.
What I should have done: shout out really loud "WE ARE SAVED!!! HALLELUJAH!" and then do a victory dance in the middle of the street while surreptitiously giving the finger to all the people around who were just watching this happen. Including one of our towns policemen.

Did I mention there was a police officer nearby? SMH.

You and the hubs manage to jump the car on the first try.

What I did: grinned like an idiot
What I should have done: hooked up the jumper cables myself to the first car instead of assuming the guy knew what he was doing.

So, now I know. I am sad that I missed a perfect opportunity to SHATNER! But there's always tomorrow....

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